Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Questions, we get questions.......

Q: Okay, so I admit I'm kind of clueless. What can I actually do to help out a friend who's going through all this shit? I guess telling her I'm jealous of her free boob job is a bad idea, huh?

A. Well yes, first off, let’s start with what would NOT be a good idea. A few weeks ago they had one of those feel-good segments at the end of the national evening news, a little vignette meant to be inspiring or show us a bit of Americana, blah blah blah. This time, they featured a woman who goes around to hospitals visiting cancer patients, toting her little keyboard and a guitar, singing uplifting songs like “Wind Beneath My Wings” and so on. It was beautiful, touching, really warmed my heart to see that kind of selflessness..........and let me say this right here and now, that if there are ever any Kumbaya-singing wandering minstrels near me at any time, ever, you are very likely to see me arrested and cuffed to a hospital bed for assault with a deadly ham.

And yeah, the boob job comment? Bad, bad idea. I'm just sayin'.

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